Blogs

I love Ethiopian adoption blogs. When we were starting our adoption research, I discovered this whole network of people who were writing about their adoptions. For several nights in a row I spent hours reading about people's adoption journeys. Some people had already returned with their children, and it was fascinating to read about the whole process in one night. Others were in a variety of stages and were sharing their milestones, thoughts and feelings about their adoption. I think I have probably checked a blog or two or ten a day since we made the decision to adopt from Ethiopia.

During pregnancy there are websites that map out your growing fetus week by week. For adoption, there isn't a specific time frame that leads to the arrival of baby. There are no weekly e-mails telling you your baby is now a size of grain of rice and this is how you may be feeling. My friends and family have not built their families this way. So, these adoption blogs provide me with reassurance about the adoption process. Through these women, I find a common connection. Some entries have made me think of something in a new way and others make me feel comforted that I am not the only one having certain thoughts around adoption, race or parenting.

I am excited for people I have never met and saddened when they experience a setback. When we got an encouraging e-mail from our agency on Friday, the first thing I did was check on the blog of a woman who has been waiting for almost 6 months for her referral. She received her referral, and now I will excitedly continue to follow her journey to her daughter.

There are also anti-adoption blogs, blogs written by adults of color who were adopted by white parents and blogs about anti-racist parenting. These blogs have also enriched the adoption experience. I have been forced to think deeply about what all this will mean for Baby Barto. I have read blogs with points of view I never would have considered, and I think this has been extremely important in widening my perspective.

The adoption journey is complex. I have been amazed by what I can access on the Internet and by the wide variety of commentary I have found on adoption. By opening my mind to diverse view points, I hope I am gathering tools that will help me parent Baby Barto.