Winter Outing

Tuba Christmas performance

Snack time

Sleepy boy

Things that turn my heart to mush...

Turo & G.G., Christmas Day

More Etsy for Ethiopia

Back when we were on the journey to become parents, I hungrily consumed adoption blogs. I read the blogs of those ahead of us in the process for a glimpse as to what was in store, and I relied on the blogs of those in similar spots to help me feel less alone in the wait. I’ve “known” some of these women for almost three years. My obsession with the blog world has lessened since we moved to the “other side,” but there are a dozen or so blogs I continue to follow. I feel like I could meet up with these ladies for coffee and talk for hours.


Julie, is one of these gals. Her blog is amazing. While reading her words, I’ve cried, laughed and returned to many of her posts again. I’m hoping to meet her and her lovely family when we head to California next month on vacation. Julie is embarking on a project with the Tesfa Foundation and Ethiopia Reads to build a school and library in her children’s birthplace in Ethiopia. So, I’ve made a few more bracelets to help support this incredible project. (I think I'm also going to add a heart charm in place of the book on a few flag ones and will add those to the etsy site when they're done.)

The Meazi

The Melese

The Tree

Last year Jose & I decided we needed a crazy Christmas Tree, so we hauled home the white one with blue lights. It's pretty spectacular when it's all lit up.

Last week, Turo and I spent one afternoon decorating it. For almost three decades my mom bought me an ornament each year to commemorate some event in my life. There is a little rocking chair for the hours she spent holding me as a baby, a car for the year I learned to drive, sea shells for the time spent in San Diego. Each one holds a special memory, a special moment. Putting them on the tree is like having mini-flashbacks to all the milestones of my life.

The bottom 1/3 of the tree is well decorated.

Turo "plays" a tune on the trumpet from my years in the band.

The Tree!

Etsy for Ethiopia

So, I'm attempting to be creative and opened an Etsy site to fundraise for humanitarian projects that will benefit Ethiopia. The first place I'm looking forward to sending a donation is to Dube Bute, Ethiopia through the Glimmer of Hope Foundation. Emily, a fellow adoptive mama and blogger, is spearheading an amazing campaign to bring clean water, a school, health clinic and veterinary center to her son Eyasu's birthplace. I feel pulled to this project because not only is Turo from the same region as Eyasu, but they also came to our agency's care center at the same time.

The hope bracelets are $15. They are made from memory wire, (they wrap around your wrist), glass seed beads and pewter letter beads. After paying for the materials and fees, I will donate $10 from each bracelet towards supporting Ethiopia. Since I have no idea if anyone other than my mom will buy one, I've only made a few. But I can ramp up production if there is any demand for them.

The red and green beads are based on the colors of the Ethiopian flag, and I plan on making yellow ones, but I'm still looking for the right beads. I can also make one that has all three colors if anyone was interested (drop me an e-mail if you have a specific request - sara_bartolomei (at) yahoo.com)

Thanks for taking a look!

Red Hope

Green Hope

Things that turn my heart to mush

While attending our last band practice in the freezing cold, Turo declared, "Mama, I'm having so much fun."

Re-Entry

I just returned from a lovely three days with girlfriends in Dallas. Three days of chatting, laughter, shopping and eating. Three days of only being responsible for myself. It was refreshing and great. I thought I’d come home all relaxed and energized. Instead, I found myself a big ball of crankiness all day.

Switching my mindset back to stay-at-home-mom kicked my behind. I was irritated by the overturned milk, the constant potty reminders (yes, we’ve embarked on that project again), the whining, the laundry, the dishes, the dried pasta on the floor, the marching band CD, the constant negotiation over so many seemingly trivial things (why is it so hard to just ride in the shopping cart?). I snapped and rushed and generally wasn’t the warmest person to my son today. At one point I handed him the iPhone (which can entertain him for a good long while) and closed my eyes. I needed a moment to breathe through the grouchiness.

Yet, the thing is, I spent half of the weekend talking about Turo, staying at home and how much I am loving it. I really do. But there was something about that lighter, solo time that was hard to let go of today.

Play ball...

Lunch Date

Band Practice

Here is Turo at the start of the marching band season.

Here is Turo at Friday's practice. At one point he told me he was cold and wanted to leave. But as soon as he stood up he changed his mind. This kid is a serious fan.

Last night

This is how I found Turo when I went to check on him last night. I couldn't resist snapping a picture before moving him back into his bed.

Color Tour

Relying on the Pure Michigan website as our guide, we headed off on the back roads to catch some fall color. The suggested route said we'd end up at a state park on Lake Erie. After an hour of driving (and some poor navigation on my part), we pulled into the park. Our first view of Lake Erie...

Somehow the Pure Michigan site forgot to mention the towering smoke stacks (and the nuclear power plant that was visible on the other end of the beach).

Baby goes shopping

Dear Nap

Oh, nap. How I miss you. The quietness you brought. The time to get things done quickly. A moment to just be still in the day. However, daytime sleep started meaning later and later night-time sleep. And grown-ups need some time at the end of the day to unwind, hang-out and get stuff done. I hope you'll still come visit from time to time when needed.

Thanks for everything,

Sara

In his first year as the Man Up Front...

Because you can't have fall without...

Peter & the Wolf

After the marching band, Turo's second obsession is Peter and the Wolf. My mom gave him some old tapes from when I was little and one of them has the Disney version of on it. Then she found a Sesame Street DVD where Baby Bear goes to see the concert and Elmo is Peter. And we have Sting's narration of it on the Ipod. Plus there are multiple videos on youtube. We listen to some version of it at least three times a day. Turo can recite chunks of the story and can sing sections of the score.

A couple of weekends ago my mom came down to stay while Jose was out of town and brought the cast with her.

Turo as Peter

Getting ready to capture the wolf

The whole crew: Peter, duck, wolf, bird and cat

Turo loves his grandma! (And so do I!)

Broccoli

Possession

Turo's language has exploded in the past few months. It actually feels like we have conversations. I can ask him about past events, and he can describe them to me. He is beginning to articulate his thoughts and feelings. He composes sentences that make Jose and me crack up. The other day he told Jose to "relax."

But I think one of my favorite additions to his vocabulary has been the use of "my" before "Mama" or "Papi" Every time he proclaims, "my mama" or my papi" to others. I beam. My heart flip flops. He has claimed us.

Dear Cindy

After we did a lot of traveling this summer and Turo slept in big beds, the time just felt right for the switch to the toddler bed in August. He "helped" me convert it, so that might have helped make the adjustment easier. He has done a good job of staying in it at night and still calls out when he wakes up. At naptime (which is being phased out - yikes!), I could hear him get out to get toys but then he went right back in. I also like it because I can snuggle with him at bedtime for a bit (but I start feeling cramped after about 10 minutes).



As for the loud factor, we haven't really encountered that particular issue too much. When he gets wound up, his volume increases as well and we have to remind him to use his inside voice. We also did a lot of practicing of quiet voices when we were getting ready for his baptism and refer to situations in which we need to whisper "like church."



Toddlers are such a trip.

My little drummer boy

Turo and Grandpa

Things that turn my heart to mush

An Afternoon Walk, Part 2

Then we were off to Meijer to pick up a few groceries. At this point I was feeling very urban as we trekked around our neighborhood. Turo had to visit the fish and ride Sandy.

Breaking the no-touch rule.

Heading home

An afternoon walk, part 1

We have been having some lovely fall weather here, so last week, with a wide open afternoon, Turo and I set off to run some errands without our car.

Checking out the grass (good thing we are not in a hurry)

Taking a break in the stroller

We had to go to Party City to buy some supplies for a baby shower we had last weekend. Turo was very curious about this life size, motion activated figure. Here is a sample of our conversation -

Turo: Where's his mouth?

Mama: Under his mask.

Turo: What is that (in his hand)?

Mama: A big knife.

Turo: Chop me?

Mama: No, Turo he's not going to chop you.

Mama (to herself): Yikes, time to go...

As we passed Target, Turo had to touch each one of the red balls in front as I looked longingly at my once favorite store.

A Mother for Choco

In the children’s section of our library, you can check out a bag of books related to a certain theme. A few weeks ago, I spied a bag of adoption books and picked it up. Over the next few nights, we added these books to our reading time. The most requested book of the bunch is a Mother for Choco (which I had actual read pre-Turo). In this book, Choco is looking for a mother (he starts the book off all alone with no mention of his first family – which was a disappointing trend in the majority of the books we checked out). Choco asks a wide variety of animals if they will be his mother, but is rebuffed by all because they don’t look the same. Finally, Mrs. Bear lovingly responds to Choco’s cries. Once he realizes that she can be his mother even though they look different, he goes home to live with her and her diverse brood of animal children.

Turo’s processing of this book has been interesting. He wants to know where Choco’s mother is. I told him that maybe she had gotten very sick or that she was unable to take care of him. Another day Turo started to pretend cry and say “I need a mommy, I need a mommy.” I asked him if he was being like Choco and he said yes. So, I replied with lines from Mrs. Bear and we reenacted the story. We’ve done the scene several times now. This is the first time Turo has brought a story into his play. I can’t help but think that something in this book resonates with him.

I’ve pointed out that Turo and Mama look different, just like Mrs. Bear and Choco. But I haven’t explicitly made the connection between the absent first mother in this book and Turo’s own first family. I should, but addressing this specific part of his story is so much harder than I thought (I'm still struggling with how to put this together for a 2 1/2 year old). I guess I need to bust out Talking to Young Children about Adoption and Toddler Adoption to assist me on this one. (Any other recommendations?)

Things that turn my heart to mush

Turo: Don't go. I don't want to miss you.

Repeat

It’s hard to believe we have just wrapped up our second summer as a family of three. As we entered into longer, warmer days, I often found myself comparing the two summers. As I’d watch Turo climb at the playground, run around outside or scamper up the stairs for bathtime with Jose, I’d think back to those early months together. Turo was trying to figure out his new world. I was navigating the unfamiliar realm of motherhood. We were finding our rhythm as a trio.

I spent a lot of last summer delighting in our little boy. I think I was on the verge of happy tears at least once a day. Everything seemed so incredible. I couldn’t wait to tell Jose the latest thing Turo did or make Turo repeat the newest word he had learned. The camera was always within reach, and I found myself snapping dozens of photos at a time. He was just so cute! But last summer also felt very long. There were the early mornings, drawn out bedtimes and numerous middle of the night wake-ups. Days I wasn’t sure how to fill. Dinners that should have taken 30 minutes to prepare were taking an hour and a half. There were the new dynamics of our marriage to figure out. I had a house to manage and attempt to keep clean while keeping a curious toddler out of trouble. There were some hard parts in those sunny days.

With a year behind us, we entered this summer secure with each other, as a family. The days generally flew by. There were many nights when the sun tricked us into thinking it was earlier than it was. We had figured out a flow, a routine. We ventured into the world, took trips, had adventures. It seemed natural.

It wasn’t until we left last summer behind that I realized all the challenges that were woven into those initial months. I guess being in the midst of it, I didn’t give it much thought. It was our reality. But a year later, I can see the progress we’ve made. Granted, there are still tough days, but now I know how to manage them a little better too.



Of course, some things haven’t changed in the past year. I continue to document every sweet/funny/adorable thing the kid does. Now instead of telling Jose about the word Turo learned, I relate entire conversations. I am repeatedly amazed by Turo’s ability to soak in information. The happy tears remain a frequent threat. And when I peek in on Turo before I go to bed, I still feel that same sense of awe as I did that first night in Ethiopia. Not quite understanding why the universe entrusted me with this child, but humbled that it did.