Our Trip Part 1: Ethiopian Orthodox Churches

Yesterday I received an inquiry about our time in Ethiopia. This was the motivation I needed to try to put together some posts about our week.

We really wanted to take advantage of our time in Ethiopia. So while Buturo played happily with his caretaker, we set out to see the sights. Our agency scheduled a few optional outings, but mostly we relied on our driver and our Lonely Planet guide book.

Holy Trinity Cathedral– This was one of the spots our agency had on its agenda for families. Emperor Haile Salassie and Empress Menen Asfaw are buried here. In addition, the grounds contain a cemetery for Ethiopian patriots and a memorial for Ethiopian officials killed during the communist take-over of the country. (FYI – you remove your shoes before entering a church & picture taking was not allowed at that cemetery.)

St. George Cathedral & Museum – This was one of my favorite spots on our trip. A deacon of the church was our guide. He did an amazing job explaining many of the important traditions, artwork and rituals of the church.

(We toured the museum by candlelight because the power was out that day)

St. Mary’s Church – This church was carved out of the earth several hundred years ago. It was about 90 minutes outside of Addis. The church was pretty amazing, but the drive there was probably the highlight of the entire trip for me (besides meeting our son, of course). Our driver suggested St. Mary’s when we expressed interest in seeing a rock church. We left around 7am and drove through the Ethiopian countryside to get there. This drive was incredible. Children ran along the road waving at us. Men were in their fields with wooden plows. Women and children were collecting water in dirty streams alongside the road. Mules carried goods to market. We saw beautifully constructed huts. And on some stretches all we saw was open land. We took this drive on our last day in Ethiopia and I can’t imagine a more perfect way to end what was an amazing week.
(I don’t remember the name of area the church was located, but your driver may know or he could call Solomon if you’re with Gladney. )

St. Mary's Church

From the road

Grandpa & Buturo

My dad sent me this photo a week after our referral. The message was titled "Me and Baby Barto enjoy another day at work." Can I tell you how much this made me smile?

Here we are together after our arrival in the U.S.

Thursday

Happy Hour(s)

Here are some snapshots from our evening...

We Skyped with Alison, Nick, Grandpa & the dogs. Turo has invented a game in which he takes things from me and puts them in the blue chair. He giggles hysterically when I "find" the item. It's pretty cute.

We did some cleaning.Who knew sweeping could be so much fun?

Turo tries to find a cozy spot between the waffle maker and the crockpot.
Life is pretty entertaining these days.

Our Joy

There are moments during our day when I look at Turo, and I can’t believe he’s my son. While we play, I am struck with a rush of happiness that I get to be his mother. It hits me right in the chest, and I almost can’t breathe. He is here. With us. We are a family.

Then in the next inhalation, I am struck with a jolt of sadness. At the core of this unbelievable joy is deep sorrow. Our delight springs from pain, tragedy and injustice. I think of the women who came before me, and how they will not see Turo’s smiles or hear his giggle. This joy began with them. It exists because they held him, nursed him and comforted him.

Now, my arms are an extension of theirs. My soothing words are their words. We are forever connected by this child. He has been loved by all of us.

So when the sorrow hits as we twirl, giggle or cuddle, I let it mingle with the bliss because it is all part of the story. I think of the women who came before and the joy is that much sweeter.

Bedtime Routine

At bedtime we pick up toys, take a bath, read (i.e. quickly turn pages or run around the room while mama reads), cuddle with a bottle and fall asleep. Now between cuddle and dreamtime, Turo has inserted do-everything-not-to-go-to-sleep-time. Just when it looks like the milk is doing the trick, his little eyes pop open and he is ready to play. I started putting him in his crib because he started getting too squirmy in the rocking chair. First, he walks around the crib, peeks at me from the bars, makes funny faces and tries out new noises. (It’s hard not to crack up.) When this doesn’t work, he moves into fake crying. Then he gets distracted by the sounds he is creating and moves back into noise making. Next, he tries the caca-fake-out. (Caca is Amharic for poop). He points at his diaper and tells me “caca.” After closer inspection, there is no caca – he just knows this will get him out of the crib. When none of these tactics work, he starts saying “mama” over and over in a wide range of voices ranging from pitiful to slightly-possessed. Eventually he lays down while continuing the mamas and extending various appendages between the crib slats. Once and awhile his little hand even beckons for me. Then, finally, after a couple of eye rubs, he dozes off.

This performance has turned bedtime into a lengthy, but comical, affair. My toddler book says I should just leave the room and come back every five minutes if he cries to reassure him I’m there. But I feel like this is opposite of what the attachment stuff says. I thought a good balance was staying in the room but not engaging with the behavior. I tried doing bedtime a bit later in hopes that he’d be more tired out, but that hasn’t worked. Then I read in my Parent’s magazine that when toddlers are too tired they can actually act wound up. Maybe I need to try putting him to bed earlier. Who knew bedtime could be so complicated? (probably anyone who has parented a toddler.)

To Julie

To Julie-
Turo and I have been dancing in the kitchen to a CD of kid classics performed by current artists. Each time Sarah Mclachlan sings the Kermit classic the Rainbow Connection I get all weepy. The lyrics seem to speak to the adoption journey. To the belief that after all that waiting, heartache, delays and more waiting, there is something beautiful on the other side. Julie, you are one of the biggest dreamers and lovers out there in the blog world, and I hope tomorrow brings you one step closer to your rainbow connection.

Rainbow Connection
Why are there so many songs about rainbowsand what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,and rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it.
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

Who said that every wish would be heardand answered when wished on the morning star?Somebody thought of that and someone believed it.
Look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us star gazingand what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

All of us under its spell.
We know that it's probably magic.

Have you been half asleep and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors.
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

Cheers,
Sara